I look disgustingly thin
It’s as if every thought I gave to you I packed all of my heavy in.
I can’t even bare the image staring back at me,
some stranger’s emaciated grin.
A face gaunt yet filled with so much sorrow
if not me….who then?
My hungry heart devours chocolate coated lies until they ooze from every pore
I keep swallowing my weight in promises made by you
until I vomit promises up on my kitchen floor.
You call— and I gluttonously stuff myself
desperately slopping up regurgitated words
as if they tasted much better than before.
Protruding from every article I own
I watch as my clothes barely hang from sharp bones
you feed me but leave me empty and alone.
He said–I believe I left room for growth–correction you left room for hurt
Pain creeps through fresh wounds like maggots crawl through rancid meat
Love birds–I can see them plug their noses
but let me tell you this love doesn’t always smell like roses.
I backstroke in my cesspool of sludge and bitter heart beats
No call in 5 months? Perhaps this grudge is holding me
He said–You love to speak hypothetically–in actuality “If we were, we would be”
I pluck a maggot from the middle of my decaying heart;
this thing is so perforated some could call it art.
I hid my love for you
Silently wedged in the soft space
between right and wrong
An orphaned emotion
coddled only by the thought of you.